Authors note: Emergency and Star Wars were two of my favorite things in the 70’s, and I would think of ways to combine the two when I was younger. Now, with the resurgence in popularity of the Star Wars trilogy, my discovery of Emergency’s popularity online, and a work patter of night shifts and day shifts in the same week, with not a lot of sleep in between, I thought I’d try again. So, strap in, get your droids in their sockets, and read on!
Note: Star Wars copyright by Lucasfilm.
“Good morning, everybody.” John Gage walked into the kitchen of Station 51 and headed straight for the coffee pot. Roy sat on the couch scratching Henry, the station mascot, behind the ears. Chet and Marco sat at the table reading the newspaper.
“Morning, Johnny,” said Roy. “How were your days off?”
John poured himself a steaming cup of coffee. “Good. My brother Mike came up for the weekend. He’s thinking of moving here after his tour is up. The airlines are looking for pilots and he’s had some job offers. How about you?”
“Good. I took Joanne and the kids to see that new George Lucas movie.”
Johnny nodded. “Mike and I went, too. How did you like it?”
“We enjoyed it. Chris loved the scenes over the Death Star. What did you think?”
“We liked it. I thought that Skywalker kid was a little too whiny to be a real farmer,” John said.
“C’mon Gage. You whine, and you’re a farmboy,” Chet said innocently as John flashed him a very dirty look. Marco snickered behind the Sports section. “What movie are you talking about?” Chet asked.
“Don’t tell me you haven’t heard of Star Wars. It’s one of the biggest movies of the year,” John said.
“Oh. That,” Chet replied as he looked at the comics. “I’ve heard of it. I hadn’t planned to see it.”
“Why not?” Roy asked.
“Because it looked stupid.”
“Stupid?” Johnny put his coffee cup on the table. “It’s a story of good versus evil. What’s so stupid about that?”
“Well for one thing, that evil guy, Darth whatever-his-name-is, looks like he got sucked into a vacuum cleaner, and ..”
The alarm tones interrupted Chet’s reply. “Station 51. Man trapped. 1541 Riviera Street. Cross street Maple. Time out 0815.” The men hustled to their vehicles.
“Station 51 10-4, KMG 365,” Captain Stanley answered into the microphone. He ripped two small notes from a pad of paper and passed one to Roy who was now in the Squad. The Captain jogged to the Engine and climbed in. The Squad and Engine pulled into traffic.
###
They pulled up in front of a modest suburban home. A young woman dressed in jeans and a T-shirt stood in the bottom of the driveway. She smiled sheepishly as Roy and John exited the squad.
“I’m really sorry about this. I tried to get him out, but I couldn’t.”
“Get who out of where?” Roy asked.
“My husband. He’s stuck in the backyard.”
“What kind of hole is he stuck in?” asked John.
“He’s not in a hole.” The woman blushed slightly. “He’s stuck in an X-wing.”
“An X-wing , Mrs.?” Captain Stanley asked.
“Mrs. Steve, Call-Me-Luke-Skywalker, Albertson.” The woman pointed to the back yard as her grin faded. “You know, those ships from Star Wars. My husband wanted to build one for the kids to play in. The kids love that movie, and so does Steve. We’ve seen it five times already. I swear he tries to use ‘The Force’ to get the television remote when I’m not looking. Anyway, Farmboy’s wedged in the cockpit. I’d better show you.”
Mrs. Albertson led the firefighters through the garage to the backyard. A skillfully constructed, child sized, wooden model of an Incom T-65 X-wing Starfighter sat next to the swingset. A ladder led to the opening of the cockpit. Two small boys wearing orange coveralls with white vests stood next to the model. The boys wore matching black boots and gloves, and had pieces of black shoeboxes taped to their vests. Each boy carried an old motorcycle helmet that had been painted to resemble the helmets in the movie. Steve Albertson struggled to raise his body from the cockpit, but sat down with a thud.
John whistled as he walked around the model. “This is really great. The detail is fantastic. How long did it take you to build?”
“A couple of months,” answered Steve. “I worked on it every night. Last night, I finished painting it. This morning I installed the chair and I thought I’d test it. You know, to make sure it was safe for the kids.”
Chet rolled his eyes. Roy nodded. “What did you use for a seat?” asked Roy as he climbed the ladder that rested against the craft.
“I took cushions from an old chair I found. My wife cut them down and re-covered them. I built a new frame.”
“We’ll have you out in a jiff, sir,” Roy said as he examined the situation. “Does anything hurt?” Roy felt around the leg openings.
“No.” Steve shook his head. “Just my pride.”
“What’s the situation, Roy?” Captain Stanley asked.
“It looks like one foot is stuck behind the pedals. If I can get it out, he should be able to climb out. If not, we’ll have to cut the pedal.”
Roy twisted Steve’s foot, but he was unable to bring the foot from beside the pedal. “You’re stuck in here pretty tight. We may have to cut an opening in the side to have room for your foot.”
“No!” Steve exclaimed. “It’ll be nearly impossible to patch, and the outside won’t look right.”
“How about some grease?” suggested John. “Maybe if we goop it up enough, we can slide his leg out.”
“Good idea, Gage,” Captain Stanley said. “Marco, I think we have some grease on the Engine.”
“Right Cap.” Marco ran to the front yard.
“We have some petroleum jelly in the bathroom,” Mrs. Albertson said. “Would that help?”
“Sure,” Captain Stanley said. Mrs. Albertson went into the house.
“Use the Force, Dad,” suggested one of the boys. He had red hair and looked to be about eight years old.
“I wish it were that easy, Tommy,” Steve said.
Chet looked puzzled. “What’s the Force?”
Tommy looked quizzically at Chet. “It’s energy that holds the everything together. Jedi knights control it. Luke used it to blow up the Death Star.”
“That’s some flightsuit,” John told Tommy. “Who are you supposed to be.”
“I’m Wedge!” replied Tommy. “I like him better than Luke.”
“Yeah,” the other boy replied. He had brown hair, and appeared to be a year or two younger than his brother. “I get to be Luke. I’m gonna be a Jedi someday, just like my Dad.”
“Mike,” Steve blushed slightly in the cockpit.
“What’s the Death Star?” Chet asked.
“It’s a space station that had a supergun that the Empire used to destroy Alderaan.” Mike gave Chet a funny look.
“He hasn’t seen the movie, yet,” explained John.
Marco returned with a small can of lubricating oil that he gave to Roy. Roy started pouring it on Steve’s leg. He dropped the nearly empty oil can on the ground as Mrs. Albertson handed him a large jar of petroleum jelly. Roy put handfuls of the petroleum jelly on Steve’s sneaker, the pedal, and the wall of the cockpit. He gave the jar to John and started maneuvering Steve’s foot. Steve stood upright as his foot broke free. The force of the motion nearly knocked Roy off the ladder. He quickly regained his balance and climbed down.
Steve climbed down the ladder and extended his hand to Roy. “Thanks.”
Roy shook Steve’s hand. “You’re welcome. Let us look at your ankle, just to be sure it isn’t broken.”
“It feels fine, really.” Steve flexed and extended his foot, and jumped up and down on his ankle.
“I guess if you can do that, you should be okay,” Roy said. “If you notice any swelling, or you have pain, call your doctor.”
“Thanks a lot gentlemen,” Mrs. Albertson said to the Firefighters. “There’s a sink inside the laundry room if you’d like to wash,” she said to Roy. He walked inside the house. She kissed her husband lightly on the forehead. “Get in the house, Farmboy, and wash your leg. I’ll clean up the mess.” She turned to Johnny as her husband went in the house. “I like Wedge better too. ‘Look at the size of that thing’ is such a classic line,” Johnny grinned. “Anyway, Luke whined so much, I felt like slapping him by the time they reached Yavin base.” She sighed as Roy came out of the house. “Thanks again, fellas.”
“Station 51 available,” Captain Stanley radioed. The crew left the yard.
Chet shook his head. “Boy, and I thought Gage was obsessive.”
“Chet.” Johnny raised his voice slightly.
“You’re whining again, Gage.”
Johnny opened and closed his mouth in an attempt to reply to the insult.
Chet continued, “I can’t believe someone would copy something like that from a movie. She said they’d seen it five times. No movie is good enough to see five times. Especially one with some hokey energy field; ships that don’t look like they could fly, and a super gun that destroys planets? Get real.”
“Help him, Obi-Roy Kenobi, you’re his only hope,” Johnny piped in solemnly as they reached the curb. Roy and the guys burst out laughing.
“It’s a good movie, Chet,” Roy said. “Give it a chance before you make up your mind.”
“You guys are nuts,” Chet shook his head and climbed into the Engine.
###
The rest of the shift was busy. They were called to a multi-alarm fire at an abandoned warehouse that took several hours to control. The guys returned to the station late in the evening. Dinner consisted of Marco’s leftover chili and Chinese food left from the previous shift. John and Marco volunteered to do the dishes as the exhausted crew hit the sack.
###
“Listen up, fellas.” Captain Stanley stood in front of a blackboard. He pointed to the center of an outline of a star-shaped space station. “Dispatch notified us that the Death Star is quickly approaching Earth. It’s our job to hit this thing before it destroys the planet.”
“How are we going to do that?” Gage whined as he pulled at the collar of his flightsuit. “We’re Firemen.”
“Obviously the cross-training we’ve done has paid off,” the Captain said impatiently. “Now shut up, you twit, and I’ll tell you.”
“The weakest point of the station is at it’s middle. There’s a large opening that runs to the center of the station. That spot is used to house the cooling fans for the nuclear reactor, or the kitchen, Intelligence didn’t know. Anyway, If the fans are destroyed, either the reactor will go critical, or the kitchen will explode. Since we all know the Empire make the hottest chili around, the effect will be the same. Use your missiles on dual fire mode. There are fourteen fans in all. Each of us will have to take out two fans for this mission to succeed.” Captain Stanley looked at the men. “Any questions?” There were none. The Captain clapped his hands. “To your X-wings, men!”
###
John and Marco walked into the dorm. Johnny noticed Chet mumbling something and moving his arms, as he turned over. He nudged Marco on the arm and they watched Chet for a moment. “That must be some dream he’s having,” whispered Marco. John nodded in agreement, and the two men proceeded to their beds.
###
“Look at the size of that thing!” exclaimed Chet as the Death Star loomed closer.
“Shut up Chet!” The chorus of voices sounded in his helmet.
“Sound off, men,” Captain Stanley ordered.
“Alpha Seven, present,” Roy’s voice sounded through the commlink.
“Alpha Two, present,” Chet heard Mike Stoker’s calm voice.
“Alpha Four, present,” Marco’s voice sounded through Chet’s helmet.
“Alpha Three, present,” Chet spoke into the microphone on his helmet.
“Alpha Five, present,” Chet heard Johnny’s voice in his helmet.
“Woof.” A synthesized voice came over the console. "Alpha Six present.” The bark made Chet’s ears ring.
“Henry!” exclaimed Roy. “I didn’t know Henry could fly.”
“Secret government project,” answered the Captain. “That’s why he never leaves the couch. Something about microchips that feed him intelligence and allows him to link up with a computer.. or the television.”
“Is that why we had the Westminster Kennel Club finals on instead of the game?” John asked.
“Woof, Woof. The French Poodle...Ooh la la,” Henry said.
“Cut the chatter,” ordered the Captain. “Lock your wings in attack position. Three, Four, and Five, take out the laser batteries on the surface. Two, and Six, get ready for your attack run.”
“Roger,” came the chorus of replies. Chet maneuvered his ship in formation with John and Marco. They made a low pass over the Death Star’s surface, firing their laser cannons at several gun emplacements. Chet managed to destroy one of the laser batteries, as did Johnny and Marco.
“I see the opening,” Chet reported as he pulled his fighter away from the surface of the Death Star. “It looks pretty clear.” Johnny and Marco followed close behind him.
“Roger, Three,” Mike replied. “We’re starting our attack run.”
Chet watched as Mike and Henry flew into the opening. He spotted several small fighters that rapidly approached the group. Two of the ships split from the main group and entered the opening.
“Enemy fighters at 10 O’clock,” Chet reported.
“I see them,” Captain Stanley replied. “Three, you and your boys take care of them. Seven and I will take the ones that just entered the opening.”
“Uh, Cap. Won’t you collide with Mike and Henry?” asked John.
“No, the opening should be wide enough for all of you,” Chet said. He steered his ship toward the nearest oncoming ship. It looked like an eyeball with wings. Chet set his lasers to dual-fire mode and pressed the trigger. The nearest Eyeball exploded in a ball of fire. Johnny and Marco destroyed two more enemy fighters. Chet saw Mike and Henry’s X-wings emerge from the opening.
“We could use a hand over here!” radioed Chet. An Eyeball closely tailed Johnny. Gage dodged the laser fire the best he could, but was hit in the droid socket. Chet flew behind the Eyeball and destroyed it.
“Thanks, Chet,” Johnny radioed. “You and Marco better get set for your attack run. I see Leader and Seven coming out of the opening. I’ll cover you.”
“Roger, Five,” Chet said as he maneuvered his X-wing away from the dogfight.
He saw a shower of sparks behind him as Gage destroyed an Eyeball that had tailed him.
“Okay Marco, let’s make this count.” Chet switched from his laser cannons to the missile battery as the two fighters entered the opening. “I’ll take the first two that we see, you take the next two.”
“Roger that.”
The targeting signal turned from yellow to red, as the fans came into range. Chet fired a salvo of missiles, and quickly targeted the next fan. It exploded as the missiles impacted. Marco had similar success. The two pilots rolled their crafts onto their starboard foils and flew out of the opening.
“That was for the doghouse!” Chet heard the synthesized voice followed the explosion of one of the Eyeballs. He and Marco rejoined the dogfight.
“You didn’t like it?” Gage’s voice came over Chet’s helmet.
“No. I’m an indoor dog. I swear the next time Chet does something that stupid, I’ll piddle in his turnout gear.”
“Okay Gage, you’re it,” Captain Stanley said.
“Why does he get to go last?” asked Marco.
“Because the whiny farmboy always goes last,” replied the Captain.
“I don’t whine!” exclaimed John. The pitch of his voice creeped slightly higher. “Cover me.”
“Sure you don’t, Junior,” said Roy. “I’ll cover for you anyway.”
Chet watched as John broke off an engagement with an Eyeball and headed towards the opening. Roy destroyed the enemy fighter after it had peeled off a final shot. The laser bolt hit one of the engine housings. It glowed brightly for a moment, then faded.
“How bad are you hit?” asked Captain Stanley.
“I’m down to seventy-five percent power, but I can still make it.” Gage flew into the opening before anyone could reply.
Chet destroyed the last of the Eyeballs. The rest of the group formed up away from the Death Star and anxiously waited for Gage. The silence on the comm was deafening.
“There he is!” exclaimed Chet as he spotted Johnny’s fighter emerge from the opening. Joy turned to horror as Johnny’s fighter was torn apart by the explosion of the Death Star. Chet threw his hands in the air to shield his eyes from the brilliant flash. His ship rocked from the explosion.
###
“Chet, wake up!”
Chet felt someone shaking him and opened his eyes. He was surprised to see Johnny standing over him.
“You’re alive,” Chet said incredulously.
Johnny looked at him curiously. “Of course I am. Come on, Sleeping Beauty. We have a run.” Johnny lifted his suspender over his shoulder and ran out of the dorm.
Chet shook his head and jumped into his turnout gear. He ran onto the apparatus floor and peeked into the kitchen. Henry was fast asleep on the couch. Chet shook his head and quickly climbed onto the Engine. That is the last time I mix sweet and sour pork with chili at the same meal.