"I hate these 'unknown calls'" Johnny complained to Roy as they headed down the freeway. "Here's your exit", he gestured.
Roy sighed, knowing it could be anything from a 90 year old woman with a flat tire to a man in a lion cage. Well, maybe not a lion cage, they were heading to a grocery store for an unknown rescue. Wouldn't that be a funny sight, he thought to himself. A lion in the middle of a grocery store. He chuckled to himself.
"What's so funny?" John asked.
"Oh just thinking of a lion in the grocery store", Roy said while still laughing.
"Wha...huh? Lion?", Johnny looked confused.
Roy continued laughing, he'd thrown himself into a fit of giggles and couldn't get the image of a lion in the grocery store and Johnny's dumbfounded look out of his mind.
"Here we go", Johnny said as they pulled into the parking lot. A large crowd had gathered outside of the store.
Several people came running towards the squad. "Hurry! You are NEVER going to believe this", a middle aged man said with disbelief on his face.
Roy looked at Johnny as he said, "There's not a lion in there is there, Mister?"
"Huh???"
"Nevermind, Sir...show us the way", Roy started walking towards the store.
As they made their way through the crowd they observed people standing on their toes, trying to get a glimpse in the window. Hushed whispers all around as the crowd parted to let the Paramedics through. John Gage crashed through the door first and came to a sudden stop. Roy was so close on his heels that he managed to bump into the back of him.
Both men stood with their mouths open in surprise. They couldn't really believe what they were seeing.
Sitting on a high shelf was a young man with his arm stuck in the jaws of a lion's head mounted on the wall. The storekeeper was on a ladder beside him reading him the riot act.
"It's your own damn fault Bob! I told ya not to try it, but no, do you ever listen to me? Serves you right, ya dummy!"
Roy and Johnny made their way around the displays to the bottom of the ladder. They could see that Bob had his arm wedged in good and tight. He was twisting around trying to get free.
"Um, Sir?" Roy said to the storekeeper. "Could you come on down so we can get at him?"
The old man muttered something about stupid kids under his breath and climbed down. Johnny traded places with him and went on up to see what could be done. He steadied Bob before he fell.
"Calm down and let's have a look here. What were you doing?" Johnny asked as he felt around the edge of the gaping mouth.
"I was cleaning the head and sorta went a bit too far" Bob answered blushing.
Roy was getting information from the old storekeeper. He looked up at Johnny and suggested maybe some soap or grease to loosen Bob's arm.
"Oh no you don't! I'm not having that lion's head damaged by that stuff! Cut off his arm instead!", the old man grouched, grinning meanly at his own comment.
Bob went into a panic. He began wriggling around again frantically. He did not want to lose his arm.
"Now settle down, both of you", Johnny said sharply. "No one is gonna cut your arm off. I don't see any other way of doing it, Sir."
Roy ducked out to the squad and brought back a huge bottle of liquid soap. He climbed halfway up the ladder and handed it to Johnny.
"Well try not to wreck the lion, okay? This is coming out of your paypacket, Bob" the storekeeper yelled up at the hapless young man.
"Ha! With what you pay me old man, you may as well keep the lot!" Bob snapped.
"Sir, you aren't helping by inflaming the situation. How did you come across that head anyway?" Roy asked trying to distract the old man. Johnny had squirted most of the bottle up into the mouth and around Bob's arm.
"My daddy shot that monster on an African safari back in '32. It was his pride and joy and he left it to me in his will when he passed on. It's all I have to remember him by."
Roy nodded appreciatively. Personally he thought it was an ugly way for such a magnificent animal to go. Stuck on some grocery store wall. He glanced up at Johnny and Bob. The soap had loosened his arm up enough to pull him out to the elbow.
Johnny shook his head with mounting frustration. "Roy, we are gonna have to use some oil too. It just needs a little more lubrication and he'll be free."
Roy turned to the shopkeeper and asked him if he could spare a bottle of cooking oil. The old man mooched over and got a bottle of the cheapest oil he could find. He looked up at Bob and opened his mouth. Bob cut in before the old man could speak.
"I know, I know, it's coming out of my pay," he said miserably.
After ten more minutes of oil, soap and tugging, Bob's arm popped out. He breathed a sigh of relief and rubbed his arm, getting the circulation moving again. Johnny helped him down the ladder and inspected his arm closely. No damage had been done, he had escaped unscathed from his tussle with the lion.
"Thanks, guys," Bob said gratefully as he wiped the oil and soap off his arm and onto his apron. "I really appreciate it."
"That's okay, Bob just don't go overboard with the cleaning in future," Johnny said grinning at him.
The old storekeeper was up the ladder in a heartbeat, examining his pride and joy carefully. He patted the lion's head affectionately and came down smiling.
"Well, boys, that was a job well done. Not a scratch on her. Thanks."
Roy and Johnny nodded to him and collected their helmets and empty bottle of soap. As they left the store and pushed their way through the enthralled crowd, they heard the old man start up again.
"I tell ya, Roy, if I ever get that crotchety in my old age let me know, okay?", Johnny said as he got into the squad.
"In your old age?" Roy asked, grinning at him. "I've been letting you know for years already."
"Oh funny, partner, real funny."